The time has officially come: I have to teach Relief Society tomorrow. So what am I doing instead of polishing off my lesson? I'm blogging about how I should be polishing off my lesson, while actually avoiding said act. I'm a genius.
I was excited at first because I love to teach, and become more excited to find out I was just a substitute and generally won't have to worry about it on top of the rest of my crazy life, but now I'm just nervous.
It dawned on me that since I live in the same house as when I was young, some of the ladies I will be teaching remember me when I was a little girl and looked exactly like Celia. That's kind of crazy and nerve wracking.
Well, train of thought was lost. I guess we'll see how it goes. As for now, I need to go to bed.
As for putting the final touches on it? Meh, it can wait until tomorrow. Especially since church does start until 2:30 PM!!
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Thursday, November 17, 2011
29 Days and Counting
As of today, I have 29 days until I take my exit exams from school and pass on the first time (if I keep saying that, maybe it'll come true, right?) then become eligible to take the NCLEX.
On the one hand, I celebrate every little achievement that brings me closer to that date - last capstone, last pediatric clinical (and subsequently, last clinical hour of my nursing school experience), last paper to write, last test to take in a particular class (which, technically, I haven't taken... yet. I will in a few days), so on and so forth. It's surreal that it's so close to the end.
And then horror sets in.
With all these little achievements means I am that much closer to the deadline of knowing absolutely everything I need to know in order to pass my exit exams and, ultimately, my boards.
It means I only have 29 days to pick the brains of the teachers I respect in order to have a better understanding. It means I only have 29 days to get my butt into gear and not allow myself to become too overwhelmed. It means I only have 29 days to figure out what I am going to do after school. Ya know, little things like getting a job.
BUT! That also means only 29 days until I am a registered. freaking. nurse. Well, kind of. I need to take boards to get that official title of RN, but I'll be a graduate nurse in 29 days.
As much as my current stress level is making me want to quit school and work at Micky D's for the rest of my life because that's the easy road, I am really excited to be done. I can't imagine my life without school taking up so much time. I can't imagine being able to have the opportunity to be the mom I want to be without being stressed out of my mind due to all the incredible amounts of homework I have looming in front of me. I can't imagine having the choice to go to church activities without feeling guilty because doing so would be neglecting my family even more. I can't imagine being able to tell people that I am a nurse - that I hold a position in society that is well respected and NOT a low-wage job that most people have straight out of high school.
So I guess all in all, I'm ready for the next 29 days to go by. Heaven knows my family is ready.
Just make it a kind of slow 29 days.
On the one hand, I celebrate every little achievement that brings me closer to that date - last capstone, last pediatric clinical (and subsequently, last clinical hour of my nursing school experience), last paper to write, last test to take in a particular class (which, technically, I haven't taken... yet. I will in a few days), so on and so forth. It's surreal that it's so close to the end.
And then horror sets in.
With all these little achievements means I am that much closer to the deadline of knowing absolutely everything I need to know in order to pass my exit exams and, ultimately, my boards.
It means I only have 29 days to pick the brains of the teachers I respect in order to have a better understanding. It means I only have 29 days to get my butt into gear and not allow myself to become too overwhelmed. It means I only have 29 days to figure out what I am going to do after school. Ya know, little things like getting a job.
BUT! That also means only 29 days until I am a registered. freaking. nurse. Well, kind of. I need to take boards to get that official title of RN, but I'll be a graduate nurse in 29 days.
As much as my current stress level is making me want to quit school and work at Micky D's for the rest of my life because that's the easy road, I am really excited to be done. I can't imagine my life without school taking up so much time. I can't imagine being able to have the opportunity to be the mom I want to be without being stressed out of my mind due to all the incredible amounts of homework I have looming in front of me. I can't imagine having the choice to go to church activities without feeling guilty because doing so would be neglecting my family even more. I can't imagine being able to tell people that I am a nurse - that I hold a position in society that is well respected and NOT a low-wage job that most people have straight out of high school.
So I guess all in all, I'm ready for the next 29 days to go by. Heaven knows my family is ready.
Just make it a kind of slow 29 days.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Another Milestone Bites the Dust
I finished my capstone a few nights ago and what a great feeling it is.
Even a greater feeling is reading the evaluations from my clinical liaison and my preceptor. They stated that they would be priviledged to work side by side with me someday and that is a great feeling coming from two people that I really look up to and aspire to be like when I am a nurse. With clinicals being a one on one thing between you and your nurse, I never see what my classmates are like with their nurses. I know what my dearest of friends are like and they are much like me - that's why we're dearest of friends. But apparently not many people are like me. Not confident in what they can do, or even allowed to do as a student. Not comfortable with the skills they learned on dummies and now trying to transfer that to a real patient that is nervous. I get it, it's nerve wracking, I was that person the first few clinicals I had and then I found my niche and pushed ahead because I'd much rather do that while I am a student and it is okay and expected to ask questions instead of when I'm a nurse and feel less qualified than the tech on the floor and I think people took notice of that.
Super. Awesome.
Last night was incredible. I was able to truly be a nurse - my preceptor let me take the reigns and push ahead. I did newborn admit assessments by myself, gave shots to said newborn, gave them baths, even assisted in delivering a baby, up front and personal seeing as how the doctor didn't make it to the big event. What an incredible feeling it was to watch a fantastic preceptor stay calm and collected while delivering a baby by herself and I was right there in the thick of things, intimately involved in the delivery process, just as if I were a nurse.
I had a giant epiphone during that experience - I was right at the patient's side and I saw a nurse just standing idly by, so I asked if she wanted to take over, and she looked me straight in the eye and said, "Why would I take over when you are doing everything you should?" And then my epiphone hit me - I AM GOING TO BE A FREAKING NURSE IN THREE MONTHS!! (God willing I pass the NCLEX and get a job.)
And that's the most awesome thing I have ever realized.
Even a greater feeling is reading the evaluations from my clinical liaison and my preceptor. They stated that they would be priviledged to work side by side with me someday and that is a great feeling coming from two people that I really look up to and aspire to be like when I am a nurse. With clinicals being a one on one thing between you and your nurse, I never see what my classmates are like with their nurses. I know what my dearest of friends are like and they are much like me - that's why we're dearest of friends. But apparently not many people are like me. Not confident in what they can do, or even allowed to do as a student. Not comfortable with the skills they learned on dummies and now trying to transfer that to a real patient that is nervous. I get it, it's nerve wracking, I was that person the first few clinicals I had and then I found my niche and pushed ahead because I'd much rather do that while I am a student and it is okay and expected to ask questions instead of when I'm a nurse and feel less qualified than the tech on the floor and I think people took notice of that.
Super. Awesome.
Last night was incredible. I was able to truly be a nurse - my preceptor let me take the reigns and push ahead. I did newborn admit assessments by myself, gave shots to said newborn, gave them baths, even assisted in delivering a baby, up front and personal seeing as how the doctor didn't make it to the big event. What an incredible feeling it was to watch a fantastic preceptor stay calm and collected while delivering a baby by herself and I was right there in the thick of things, intimately involved in the delivery process, just as if I were a nurse.
I had a giant epiphone during that experience - I was right at the patient's side and I saw a nurse just standing idly by, so I asked if she wanted to take over, and she looked me straight in the eye and said, "Why would I take over when you are doing everything you should?" And then my epiphone hit me - I AM GOING TO BE A FREAKING NURSE IN THREE MONTHS!! (God willing I pass the NCLEX and get a job.)
And that's the most awesome thing I have ever realized.
Thursday, October 6, 2011
C'est la Vie
At the request of a dear friend from work, I must update my blog.
Life has been overwhelmingly ho-hum. I have started my capstone in the Women's Center at my local hospital (Hooray for not having to drive more than 5 minutes to get there!). Initially, it was just in Post-Partum... over night... with two part time nurses that get called off all the time. So! I worked my way over to Labor and Delivery, which is slightly more exciting. So far, I have completed 4 nights on Post Partum, and one on Labor and Delivery which makes a total of 5 out of my required 9. So. Stinking. Close. Only one more night on Post Partum and three more on Labor and Delivery and in a short (let's hope and pray) 11 days from now, I will be done with my capstone experience. And luckily, I will not have any more 24+ hour "days." Just a lot of switching my schedule back and forth in a matter of days between night Capstone and day classes.
meh.
I have gone back to being scheduled at work which, in short, is exhausting. I have been so disillusioned with working as a CNA at an Assisted Living Facility as I get closer and closer to becoming a nurse and getting certifications that will hopefully put my foot a little bit further in the door of Emergency Care - i.e. as far from Long-Term Care as possible.
That's not to say I don't have a deep and profound love for those of whom I take care. It's really incredible the love that develops when you serve others, even if it is in a setting where they are forced to accept per se due to handicaps and you are paid to provide.
School... well, I'm burned out, to say the least. Just trying to keep up with how I've been doing previous semesters so I don't blow all my hard work because I have an emotional break down. Or two.... or three.
ALSO! I've been called as a Relief Society Instructor. I have yet to teach, and hope I can buy time for two more Sundays. Only lesson I've learned is that Heavenly Father does have a sense of humor, but who am I to doubt if I can or cannot do it? Somebody out there thinks I can and if there is anything I've learned in the last 18 months is that I can do a whole heck of a lot more than I ever imagined and still be able to wake up and face the next day.
Also, this was birthday week. Thomas' birthday was on Tuesday and I had stinking Capstone that night so all we did was go out to lunch after Aiden went to a friend's birthday party. And Celia's birthday is tomorrow. Pictures will be posted. No promises that it'll be tomorrow.
Or even anytime in the near future.
P.S. You're welcome, Chantel. Hope it was worth it.
Life has been overwhelmingly ho-hum. I have started my capstone in the Women's Center at my local hospital (Hooray for not having to drive more than 5 minutes to get there!). Initially, it was just in Post-Partum... over night... with two part time nurses that get called off all the time. So! I worked my way over to Labor and Delivery, which is slightly more exciting. So far, I have completed 4 nights on Post Partum, and one on Labor and Delivery which makes a total of 5 out of my required 9. So. Stinking. Close. Only one more night on Post Partum and three more on Labor and Delivery and in a short (let's hope and pray) 11 days from now, I will be done with my capstone experience. And luckily, I will not have any more 24+ hour "days." Just a lot of switching my schedule back and forth in a matter of days between night Capstone and day classes.
meh.
I have gone back to being scheduled at work which, in short, is exhausting. I have been so disillusioned with working as a CNA at an Assisted Living Facility as I get closer and closer to becoming a nurse and getting certifications that will hopefully put my foot a little bit further in the door of Emergency Care - i.e. as far from Long-Term Care as possible.
That's not to say I don't have a deep and profound love for those of whom I take care. It's really incredible the love that develops when you serve others, even if it is in a setting where they are forced to accept per se due to handicaps and you are paid to provide.
School... well, I'm burned out, to say the least. Just trying to keep up with how I've been doing previous semesters so I don't blow all my hard work because I have an emotional break down. Or two.... or three.
ALSO! I've been called as a Relief Society Instructor. I have yet to teach, and hope I can buy time for two more Sundays. Only lesson I've learned is that Heavenly Father does have a sense of humor, but who am I to doubt if I can or cannot do it? Somebody out there thinks I can and if there is anything I've learned in the last 18 months is that I can do a whole heck of a lot more than I ever imagined and still be able to wake up and face the next day.
Also, this was birthday week. Thomas' birthday was on Tuesday and I had stinking Capstone that night so all we did was go out to lunch after Aiden went to a friend's birthday party. And Celia's birthday is tomorrow. Pictures will be posted. No promises that it'll be tomorrow.
Or even anytime in the near future.
P.S. You're welcome, Chantel. Hope it was worth it.
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Dirty Dash
So I participated in a 10/5K (it was a 10 K, but had a 5 K short cut - I wussed out and took the 5K.) today. Volunteered last week. It was a blast! However, I will be blowing muddy boogers out of my nose for days, I'm sure.
Those shorts were baby blue this morning.
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